Anne TootillTo Be or Not to Be a Mother -Part One
September 25th 2006 15:28
[All sewn up and no where to go. The operation was a success but the patient died. O.K. so maybe she didn’t actually die but the way things had been going it didn’t feel as if she/me/the patient had much life to live.
“Now Donna, normally a stitch is all that’s needed to correct an incompetent cervix (in layman’s terms -to keep the baby from falling out) but in your case we need to take additional steps to reduce the chance of premature delivery,” the doctor explained as I silently chanted, “my pregnancy is normal, my pregnancy is normal, my pregnancy is normal” in the hopes that this spiritual, new agey positive imagery stuff would somehow shift the negative forces surrounding my pregnancy and turn my frown upsidedown. At that point I probably would tried almost anything to put off hearing what I knew the doctor was about to say next.
“You will have to spend the next four months lying in bed. And I mean lying. No sitting, except for twenty minutes at lunch and dinner. You can use the bathroom and I want to see you once a week to do an internal, but other than that you’re flat on your back,” he said. “I know it sounds rough but think of it as resting up for the baby. Believe me in four months you’ll be wishing you were back in bed,” he assured me with a fatherly smile. If only I had sacrificed a pig, lamb, a goat along with the chanting. Maybe sacrificing a virgin would have hit the spot.
Four more months in bed? Hadn’t I just been paroled? It wasn’t fair. It just wasn’t fair. Being pregnant was nothing like I’d heard. How come no one mentioned morning sickness so bad that sleep was your only reprieve? That you could get so ill you’d have to be hospitalized. I was at death’s door before my parents finally convinced my hubby to take me to the hospital. And it wasn’t until the lab report confirmed my health crisis that he would even begin to reconsider that pregnancy myth. You know the one about how all mothers- to- be are glowing.
Four more months in bed. Flat on my back? What could I do lying flat on my back? And keep in mind that I am still drooling. Four months lying in bed. I hope my husband paid the cablevision bill.
“Now Donna, normally a stitch is all that’s needed to correct an incompetent cervix (in layman’s terms -to keep the baby from falling out) but in your case we need to take additional steps to reduce the chance of premature delivery,” the doctor explained as I silently chanted, “my pregnancy is normal, my pregnancy is normal, my pregnancy is normal” in the hopes that this spiritual, new agey positive imagery stuff would somehow shift the negative forces surrounding my pregnancy and turn my frown upsidedown. At that point I probably would tried almost anything to put off hearing what I knew the doctor was about to say next.
“You will have to spend the next four months lying in bed. And I mean lying. No sitting, except for twenty minutes at lunch and dinner. You can use the bathroom and I want to see you once a week to do an internal, but other than that you’re flat on your back,” he said. “I know it sounds rough but think of it as resting up for the baby. Believe me in four months you’ll be wishing you were back in bed,” he assured me with a fatherly smile. If only I had sacrificed a pig, lamb, a goat along with the chanting. Maybe sacrificing a virgin would have hit the spot.
Four more months in bed? Hadn’t I just been paroled? It wasn’t fair. It just wasn’t fair. Being pregnant was nothing like I’d heard. How come no one mentioned morning sickness so bad that sleep was your only reprieve? That you could get so ill you’d have to be hospitalized. I was at death’s door before my parents finally convinced my hubby to take me to the hospital. And it wasn’t until the lab report confirmed my health crisis that he would even begin to reconsider that pregnancy myth. You know the one about how all mothers- to- be are glowing.
Four more months in bed. Flat on my back? What could I do lying flat on my back? And keep in mind that I am still drooling. Four months lying in bed. I hope my husband paid the cablevision bill.
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Comment by Little Angry Doll
Falling Haiku Leaf
Get help! Friends calling, books that make you smile, but not laugh - I used Terry Pratchett - and try to relax. And I know how stupid that sounds.
PS - the 3 month old - he was 2 weeks over due in the end.