Anne TootillTo Be or Not to Be a Mother -Part One
September 12th 2006 15:54
So few choices so little time. Gotta get married. Gotta have babies. No time to think, no need to think. After all as everyone knows this is the path a woman is supposed to take. Wasn’t it part of the Ten Commandments or some equally all-knowing, handed down since the beginning of time, document carved in stone? Here comes the bride all dressed in white, dum dum da dum dum…One month, two, three, a year later and I’m on a list to see a fertility specialist. Don’t want to wait too long everyone says. There will be tests and more tests and surgical procedures and, and, and…so much to do and so little time. My clock is ticking, tic toc, tic toc, tic toc each and every day a little more time gives out on my biological clock.
I’d never really given it much thought. About having children that is. It was what I was supposed to do and I always did what I was supposed to do. I was so good at trying to please everyone. Most women are. So, having difficulty getting pregnant was getting in the way of what I had to do. What I needed to do. I was on a mission. This was my goal. Even if I hadn’t given it much thought. Not that there was any time to think. I had to do, not think. Had to take my temperature, had to get ovulation smears and had to listen to every Tom, Dick and Harry who told me that this would be the night so go get laid. O.K. so maybe only one friend actually put it that way but everyone else was quick to offer up an opinion/psychic prediction.
If truth be told it was no picnic in the park, roll in the hay or pumpy in the rumpy. Sex was purely for one thing and if you’re thinking fun, time to do a 180 because, that was the last thing on our mind. And then like that little engine who thought he could, all my hard work paid off. At long last the rabbit died. I could finally exhale. Now the fun would begin. It was going to be all about me.
I’d never really given it much thought. About having children that is. It was what I was supposed to do and I always did what I was supposed to do. I was so good at trying to please everyone. Most women are. So, having difficulty getting pregnant was getting in the way of what I had to do. What I needed to do. I was on a mission. This was my goal. Even if I hadn’t given it much thought. Not that there was any time to think. I had to do, not think. Had to take my temperature, had to get ovulation smears and had to listen to every Tom, Dick and Harry who told me that this would be the night so go get laid. O.K. so maybe only one friend actually put it that way but everyone else was quick to offer up an opinion/psychic prediction.
If truth be told it was no picnic in the park, roll in the hay or pumpy in the rumpy. Sex was purely for one thing and if you’re thinking fun, time to do a 180 because, that was the last thing on our mind. And then like that little engine who thought he could, all my hard work paid off. At long last the rabbit died. I could finally exhale. Now the fun would begin. It was going to be all about me.
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Comment by migraineur
The Migraineur
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The Migraineur
Time to take my temp, time to check CM, time to have sex. Were on a tight schedule here, no time to waste, and certainly no time to enjoy the process.
I really hope all of the acupuncture, vomitous chinese herbs and the mind altering clomid (which seems to have the effect of turning my into a PMT banshee) is worth it in the end!